just so we’re clear:
- getting called out for doing something shitty is not the same as “getting hate”
- if someone is telling you that you did something shitty, they are not criticizing you as a person
- messing up does not make you an irredeemably awful human being
- but how you respond to criticism can be a pretty good indicator of your awfulness
Several days later, Mako and Ryuko were out enjoying themselves a fine, dandy, delicious lunch. Or at least Mako was. Ryuko sat next to her, dark circles under her eyes from lack of sleep. But her back was tensed and she kept her eyes peeled on the highest point of the school, paranoid Satsuki Kiryuin would appear at any moment with the lighting overkill and the booming voice.
Mako’s voice made her jump and look around in alarm, thinking some random club was waiting in the bushes ready to attack them. “What?”
“Isn’t it a nice day?” Mako said happily, practically wiggling with happiness like a pup begging to be pet.
Ryuko wilted when she failed at spotting assailants. “I guess.” She grunted tiredly.
“You know what would make this day even better?” Mako’s eyes were bursting in anticipation and Ryuko knew she had no choice but to prompt.
Ryuko groaned. “Is that so?”
“Yep!” Mako answered, shoveling food into her mouth as she talked. “You’re so lonely I heard you talking with your uniform last night! That’s kind of creepy, Ryuko!”
Ryuko blushed bright red and felt a little defensive. “That doesn’t mean I’m lonely!”
“You were talking about the president too!” Mako went on, heedless of Ryuko’s reservations. “It sounds to me like you wanna be friends with her!”
“Wha-?” Ryuko balked at the assessment. “I-I-I don’t want to be friends with her!” She yelled, flustered beyond all reason. She wanted to kick the woman’s ass (as well as do other things to that ass), not make friends with her!
“You should invite her to eat lunch with us!” Mako’s suggestion plowed ahead with her own thoughts.
Ryuko felt like she was being hammered into a corner. “N-No! Never!”
“Or maybe you wanna do other things with her! I mean, I know you’re gay! You ogled me while I was in the shower even though you beat my dad and brother up for doing the same thing! But I let you because you’re sexy!”
Ryuko froze…before her jaw hung open and steam rose out of her ears. “W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-W-!” She stammered hardcore as Mako just looked at her.
“…Well, you do.” She said.
“Y-You knew about that?!”
“You’re not that good at hiding.” Mako’s voice was way too chipper.
…And with that, Ryuko screamed.
Satsuki was sitting on top of the school, when she heard something from down below. She sipped her tea calmly, before she looked down. “…Nonon?”
“Did you hear someone screaming?”
“…Nope.” Nonon said with a bit of a smirk.
“I didn’t think that you did.” She said…before Nonon made a comment.
“…You know, if this whole business is bothering you that much, why don’t you make a booty call?”
Satsuki almost spat out her drink. Thankfully, she was a young woman of fine taste so she did no such it went flying all over her carpet. “What?!” She sputtered.
“You should call. For her booty.” Nonon said it without a hint of irony. “Booty call.”
“…That’s so…so vulgar!” Satsukii shouted with a harsh blush.
“And you’re kinda acting a little flustered. It’s incredible, I’ve never seen you like this.” Nonon frowned. “And it’s scary.”
Satsuki opened her mouth…before she paused. “…I’ve been acting so…so uncouth ever since that fight.”
“Yeah. Try five days of stuttering and awkwardness. And that Ryuko girl hasn’t been fighting too much herself.”
“She…” Satsuki gulped with a blush. “…It’s so frustrating.”
“Because you’re not in control.” Nonon said. “For once.”
“Look. I’ve been your friend for a long time.” Nonon said. “I’ve learned to pick up on these things…and this is the first time you’ve acted like this.” She crossed her arms. “You have to get it out of the way or else this’ll keep happening.”
“…If this is the first time, then how are you so familiar with it?” Satsuki asked.
“Because…” Nonon froze. “…I’m guessing.”
“That’s reassuring.” Satsuki murmured, flatly. “…But…perhaps I can do this…’booty call’.” She walked over to the edge and quickly tried to wipe away her blush. She whipped out her sword and sheath, slammed it into the ground and .in the midst of lunch, she stood gracefully upon the top of Honnouji high.
Ryuko spat out a croquette just as Mako tried to shove it into her mouth. “The hell?” She turned to see the bright sun shining into her face…and Satsuki standing gracefully above her. She clenched her teeth and tried to suppress a blush. “Satsuki…”
Satsuki had a blush herself…but then…she said it. “I have come here to call…FOR YOUR BOOTY!” …And despite her grace and skill…her blush intensified
Ryuko paused. Then she blinked. Then she opened her mouth. And then it closed. And then she sputtered. And then she asked. “…What.”
“…Your rear.” Satsuki said. “I want to have sex with it.”
“Do you even know what you’re saying?!”
“I know exactly what I’m saying! I want to fornicate with you!” Satsuki said.
“You’re saying this in front of the school!”
“You’re not afraid of stripping naked for your cause! Why should you be upset about talking about having sex with a woman?”
“Because that’s fucking private!”
“Letting the rules of society get you down again?”
“No! I just don’t want everyone to know I’m going to fuck a woman! Let alone one that tried to kill me!”
“So you don’t like women?”
“I do like women! I’m as straight as a fucking rainbow!”
“So you’ll fornicate with me?”
“If it means this conversation ends, then yes!” …And then the words that Ryuko just said quickly caught up with her brain. “…Wait, what did I just-”
“Excellent. Meet me up here in about five hours.”
“Wait, nononon-” And like that, the lights dimmed, and Satsuki was back in her own private quarters.
Ryuko just sat there, staring back up at the tower, before she slapped her face with both of her hands. “…What the hell did I get myself into?”
“The president’s pants!” Mako cheered from behind her.
Tried to work on cosplay but this trouble maker got in the way.
This is what bun do.
Help me, I don’t know how to make babies
Holy shit why are they so cute.
Holy shit that’s adorable.
reblog if u are tired of the sexism in the fart community
rwebolg for jusass.c
Disclaimer: I hate lemons. I really, really do. They are, by and large, made explicitly so that the author can jack off to it.
The fact that I don’t quite understand sexual attraction at all doesn’t help.
Angel0Wonder said it would be interesting if I wrote one, specifically because “Well, Moid, you’re asexual, right? Should be interesting!”
So fuck it.